Or maybe a mixture of the two?

Two of my clients have mentioned in the last week how anxious they are feeling about the holidays.

One is a working mum worried that the delicate balance of childcare she’s arranged won’t hold up and she’ll be left trying to organise something at the last minute. The other is a full time mum with school age children who isn’t sure how she’s going to keep them occupied for the summer, and keep her sanity!

I completely understand how they’re feeling, and know that there’s also something else going on.

There’s a great dollop of guilt.

Guilt that they are anxious about the holidays. Guilt that they aren’t looking forward to having more time to spend with their children. Guilt that they aren’t as excited about the holidays as their children..

Guilt that they are wishing the holidays are over, before they’ve even started..

Does that resonate with you?

So what’s the answer? I’m not going to tell you not to feel guilty. If you feel it, just sit with it. Our feelings exist for a reason, they are trying to guide us somewhere.

What I will tell you is that you aren’t alone. Many parents will be feeling a similar way and sometimes knowing that you aren’t the only one, helps a little. I’ll also tell you that dwelling on how you feel for too long isn’t going to help either.

I think guilt is one of the most time wasting exercises there is!

Feeling guilty doesn’t change anything. It can’t take you back in time to allow you to spend more time with your children when you wish you had.

I think guilt is one of the most time wasting exercises there is!

But, you can use this feeling as a guide.  If you’re feeling guilty, ask yourself why.  What is it about the situation that you wish you could change? Is there a step or two you could take towards changing it?

My advice, try to learn what your guilt is telling you.  Take something useful from it, and then try to let it go.

How do you let it go?

Focus on being happy.  Focus on the positives.  Focus on being present in the now and not dwelling on the past, and what you can’t change.